Laxin in Fe-Brew-ary

The time has finally come,


Or it should have, if not for the freak snowstorm that left the fields covered in the white stuff.  I guess we will just have to wait a few more days to start the season.  In the meantime, we've been busting our humps to get in shape for the beach on spring break...or for lacrosse, hard to see what the top priority is at this point.  With our first games this Saturday at JMU, the Terps need every day they can to knock the rust off their legs, pot bellies and the ole' twigs that have seen nothing but the back of our closets and chipotle burritos for the past two months.

February also brings the promise of new swag that each and every Terp has been longing for since the fall.  New shorts, new helmets, long-sleeve Under Armor, and last but not least the coveted custom King II's.  Everyone knows that just playing lacrosse is not enough; looking good while doing it is what every true lacrosse player should strive for.  Plus, half of the allure of the Club Lacrosse Team is the gear that each player gets when they join the team.  The sloozies of college park will come running when they see you wearing your Terps Lacrosse Gear on campus, so get prepared to be a hot commodity.  Personally, I have lost a pair of sweatpants and a sweatshirt to the female vultures that swoop down and snag your swag right from under your nose, and once that happens you can kiss your gear goodbye.  To prevent future theft, as everyone should, I have created a disposable wardrobe of old high school swag and various other articles of clothing that can be offered to the scavengers so that my Terps gear stays safe and in my possession.

As for lacrosse, the team really has been busting their asses to get in shape after winter hibernation.  With multi-lingual exercises led by Maseeh and ab workouts by Eddie Harris, the team is starting to look like the preview for 300.  At the very least we've been looking good for all of the girls' club teams that come to Cole to check us all out.  Might I say they have also been displaying unusually high levels of talent this spring which could be utilized in future social events.  As for actual practice, the Terps have been limited to Tuesdays on the Cole Field House mini turf fields and outside practices have been out of the question.  At least if we can't catch and throw, we will be able to run circles around the competition.

There are high hopes for the Maryland Club Lacrosse team this spring.  After a disappointing finish in the playoffs last year, the Terps are looking to rebound with their second NCLL National Championship title in three years.  This is a lofty goal, but also one that is well within the team's reach.  With almost an unlimited amount of talent in the dozens of returners paired with extremely skilled incoming freshman and new players, it is hard to think of a single team that can match up with the Terps.  Of course they will have their first test of ability this weekend in the beautiful Harrisonburg, VA in the middle of the Shenandoah Valley.  The Terps will play at least three games with the possibility of five or six assuming that UMD will trounce the competition as expected.

The Terps are better prepared, better led, in better shape and more skilled than any team in the NCLL... and perhaps the world.  So let's go out a b some l's on some t's boys!

And as always,

NEVER PULL OUT!

Your faithful brethren,

Andrew "Born Ready" Sotak

Kickin' Off the New Year

I make my return after a well-deserved winter hiatus to discuss something extremely important...Lacrosse

But First let me start with a quick recap of the last month:

•  Tiger Woods caught cheating on his babe of a wife with 13+ other women.  Two of whom happen to be porn stars.  All of whom happen to be young white girls...black women across the nation were outraged.  PGA is pissing their pants with viewership forecasted to go (as Jay Sean would say) down, down, down, down, down

•  Maryland Basketball began their season, and has now entered into the ACC portion of their schedule.  Currently the Terps stand at (10-5), (1-1) in the ACC.  Hayes currently shooting 48% from 3-point range...epic
  

• NFL playoffs are in full swing.  Baltimore is still in the mix, facing the Colts this weekend.  Redskins locked up the 4th pick in the draft next year (woop woop!) 

• Capitals remain at the top of the Southeastern conference led by Ovechkin and Backstrom, both of whom are in the top ten for points in the NHL.  Hockey players across the world also prepare for the 2010 Winter Olympics, which begin on February 12
 

•  An earthquake that hit seven on the Richter scale pummeled the Haitian capital of Port Au Prince.  Hundreds of thousands are dead with thousands more still missing

•  2009 came to an epic end for 108 members of the Maryland Ski and Snowboard club in Quebec City, Canada.  The party was at the world-famous Degobert club (right), and you better believe that I was poppin' bottles.  An unidentified number New Years Resolutions were broken soon after...

So now that we have that out of the way, we can get to the important stuff.  As I write to you know, we stand but only a week from the beginning of the spring semester.  While this may bring grief to those who see a new semester as new classes and tests, I, on the other hand, go into the spring with something else on my mind.  No, its not who's in my classes or how much my books are gonna be, nor is it how much I have in my bank account.  This is the spring we are talking about, a time of temperatures rising, girls wearing skirts and tank tops, and, most importantly... tis' the season of LAX.

Of course I'm thinking about lacrosse. The spring is the grand stage for our wonderful sport, and man has the stage been set for the Terps Club Lacrosse team.  The 2008 NCLL National Champions are coming off of an extremely strong fall season where they lost only once.  The team enters the spring with great depth on both sides of the ball, especially after the return of players that were unable to play in the fall.  The Terps will see their strongest competition from the usual suspects: Virginia, Delaware, Navy, and Salisbury, the only team to beat Maryland this past fall (In OT).

The Maryland Club Lacrosse Team is bursting with confidence.  The whole squad knows that they have the talent and drive to make up for last years disappointing and embarrassing loss in the first round of the playoffs against Navy.  And they want to not only make up for it, but soar past it back to the top as the 2010 NCLL National Championship, a point that every member of the Terps knows that they are capable of reaching.

The season gets a frigid start with the Terps first game on February 13.  Other important dates include the Richmond Rumble Tournament on February 27, and the Beltway Bash held at the University of Maryland on March 26 and 27. A tentative full schedule has already been released and is posted in the calendar at the top of the page.  Keep posted for more specific details of games including the opponents and times, as well as any updates to the schedule as the season progresses.

Everyone is encouraged to come out for games with their friends to help support your Maryland Club Lacrosse team.  All home games are played on the Comcast Turf fields, adjacent to the Comcast Center.

Until next time,

Never Pull Out!

-Sotak

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Playoffs? You're Talkin About Playoffs?!?

Now that the Lacrosse season has come to a sweet, sweet end with a win with a trophy from ECU, there are a few things that the team can look forward too with practice and games in the past. For example:

• Nap time has replaced practice on Monday and Wednesday

• Friday afternoons now equal TT adventures

• And most importantly raging hardcore on the turf for flag football playoffs...

This past Sunday, the #2 seeded Thirsty Turtle Swamp Donkeys met The Freeballers on the field after a relaxing bye week. The Donkeys continued their regular season domination of opponents and recorded their first shutout of the year. The offence was a little slow getting started on Sunday under the lights, maybe a little sluggish after the bye. However, the defense was just as solid as it has been all season, preventing a very strong Freeballers offense from scoring a single point.

Both touchdowns by the Swamp Donkeys were scored by quarterback David Griffith, one by land and one by air to wide receiver Brenden Moles. Andrew Sotak also recorded an extra point on a pass that was deflected high into the air and into his steady arms across the goal line. The main success for the Swamp Donkeys this week was their protection of the quarterback. The Freeballer rush was nearly non-existent with strong blocking by Steve Kosiba, Mike Boyd, Ben Yoash, and Ben Cobleigh from the running back position. The Donkeys also found most of their successful plays in the short game with dump-off passes to the running back and linemen. The longest play of the day, however, came on a bomb from David Griffith to Ben Yoash playing as the left wide recover at the end of the game. Yoash battled a lot of contact from the Freeballer cornerback while making the catch down the sideline. The catch came at the end of the game to seal the win for the Swamp Donkeys and advance them to round three of the playoffs.

The defense was more of the same this week, restricting the opposing offence to very short gains. The defense also recorded four sacks on the Freeballer quarterback, who was never able to get into a rhythm with the relentless rush by the Swamp Donkey defensive line. As usual, cornerback Brenden Moles met his gamely quota of two interceptions, both in very dangerous areas of the field with the Freeballers driving toward the end zone. Also, reassuring my belief in God, Nick "Hands-Feet" Heil recorded his first interception of the season off a tipped pass. The whole Swamp Donkey sideline was speechless as they witnessed the miracle take place. With that said, it was safe to say that the Swamp Donkey's defense remains one of the top defensive units in the league, recording multiple takeaways in every game this season.

With the win, the Donkeys only have a three day rest before they play the Super Smash Bros this Wednesday at 10pm. The game is on field 3 of the Comcast Turf where the Swamp Donkeys hope to capitalize on their home field advantage in the match-up. The Super Smash Bros are no pushovers though. Along with being one of the greatest N64 games of all time, they also have put together a strong football team with Captain Falcon at quarterback, and Kirby at wide receiver who seems to suck-up any pass that comes his way, not to mention his incredible hang time. They stand now at 4 and 1 on the season, but it can also be argued that they haven't been tested fully in their games so far. Their wins came against teams that combined have only recorded 5 wins total, 4 of which were recorded by Slappin the Bass who narrowly lost to the Super Smash Bros 16-14 in the regular season. Also, the Super Smash Bros loss came against powerhouse Nitro Explode that shut them out 26-0.

Nevertheless, the Swamp Donkeys look to continue their winning ways past Wednesday and into the 4th round of the playoffs. They enter the match-up with the Super Smash Bros with confidence and experience, a deadly combination on the gridiron and in the bedroom. So come out and support your club lax team at 10pm at Comcast this Wednesday. Sloozies and Dews are always welcome at our games.

Until next time,

NEVER PULL OUT!

-Sotanked aka Born Ready

Club Lax Takes It Home in the Boneyard Classic

Greenville, NC - Home of the ECU (Butt) Pirates - The University of Maryland Terps have ended a string of disappointing tournament finishes. This past weekend the Terps visited Greenville, North Carolina to compete in East Carolina University's annual Boneyard Classic. Club Lacrosse came, saw, and conquered the competition, the fishbowls, and the ladies at ECU. When all was said and done, the Terps came home with a tournament record of 5-0 and a big ole trophy to flaunt.


The Terps arrived safely at the Days Inn in Greenville, Friday evening; it was the opposition that would find the scene dangerous when the Terps took the field Saturday morning. After myself arriving back at the hotel , not so well rested through a thick crowd of rousing Terps laxers, in style and full of Bojangles, and corralling the rest of the team from various locations, the Terps made their way to the amazing ECU intramural sports complex. Six well-kept, bluegrass-sodded fields lay before the hungry team as they prepared for what would be their hardest game of the weekend. The first game for the Terps was against their heated rivals and reigning NCLL national champions, the University of Virginia. Virginia always has a great team and has annually been a thorn in Maryland's side in the past. Saturday was no different; it took a suspenseful overtime goal by attackman Andrew Fisher for the Terps to get their first win against the Cavaliers since their overtime thriller last spring.


UVA turned out to be the only real competition for the Terps on Saturday, as Maryland rolled over their next two opponents, crushing Dirty Dogs Lacrosse and goose-egging Coastal Carolina University 9-0. With a 3-0 record after Saturday, the Terps took the number one seed in the tournament playoff on Sunday. Their first opponent would be the Dukes of James Madison University at high noon. JMU put up a fight, but Maryland put those dogs down like Mike Vick with outstanding face-offs by Dave Balinsky and Andrew Sotak, superb ball control similar to the girl grinding on Jed in his sweatpants and impressive scoring by the Terps high-power offense, and the suffocating defensive effort put forward by the Terrapin defense, the Dukes could never get into any sort of momentum and the Terps were soon headed toward the championship game, once again playing their Virginia rivals from UVA.


From the get-go of the championship game and at Still Life, Maryland looked sharper, stronger and flat-out better than the Cavaliers. Maryland was moving the ball fluidly offensively, and was stopping the relentless UVA offensive attack like the UNCW lax girl on Bruce's late night fun Saturday night. The Terps refused to let up and kept the pressure on UVA keeping true to the never pull out mentality. After a scary assassination attempt by Andrew Barber on the Cavalier's goalie, UVA was forced to put in a backup goalie, who did quite well for the Cavs considering the fact that he hadn't played the position in years. He was still no match for the Terps offensive attack that continued to pour on the goals in the second half of the game. UVA did manage to score a few goals in the second half; however, the Terps were never in any real danger in the game and easily coasted high in the Sky Bar to the win, and the 2009 Boneyard Classic first place trophy.


After going swimming in dozens of fishbowls, the Terps turned their weekend in Greenville into a great success. Having beaten the 2009 NCLL national champs twice now, the Maryland Club Lacrosse team has high hopes for the spring season. The Terps have another tough matchup this week against the team that knocked them out of the playoffs in the first round last year, Navy. After an embarrassing loss at home to the Midshipmen in the spring, Maryland looks to turn the tables this Friday night and continue their win-streak for the fall. This will also be a good test to see how the Terps match-up against the team that dominated them in the playoffs last year.


Everyone is encouraged to come out this Friday to support your Maryland Club Lacrosse team against the Navy Midshipmen. The game time is set for 8:00pm at the Comcast Turf Fields. Bring some friends and some dew and cheer on the Terps as they look for retribution for their last game against Navy last spring.


Until next time,
NEVER PULL OUT!

Especially while getting’ one rubbed out on the dance floorrrrrr

-Sotak out